Wow. A small portion of steamed broccoli and 1/2 cup cooked rice with butter do amazing things such as put me to sleep at 6:30pm...fell asleep while watching "America's most infamous grave sights" on TV. The show was interesting, but POOF! There I was asleep. I woke up about 8 and here I am, awake. I hope this unplanned, little nap won't cause me problems in getting back to sleep at my normal time (10:30 or 11:00). I came home today early and went swimming around 4pm, it was hot..88 degrees (hot for here). Jay went with me. I have found that even though I can swim perfectly fine I feel more confident in the water when I have someone with me. I have this strange fear of drowning. God knows why. I seem to have a fear of EVERYTHING sometimes!! Neurotic city, I tell ya, that is me!! I had a great weekend with Jay's mom. Friday night she picked me up from the Bainbridge Island Ferry. I actually sat up on the sun deck the whole time..so beautiful. I was listening to Yo La Tengo, so that made it even more trance-like for me. Usually when Jay and I ride the ferry across the Sound we have the car and we rarely leave it to go upstairs. It's been perfect weather since Friday. So, mom-in-law comes and gets me and we go immediately to the Harbour Club Public House which is this nice little (ok, kinda yuppie but nice) pub/restaurant along the water. We eat dinner and have a drink (I drank a Pike Place "Kilt Lifter"..good locally brewed heavyish beer..Yum! Plus I love the name). Oh yea, I think men in Kilts are sexy. When I used to go to the Vogue with Michelle in my single-ish days there were a couple of guys that would come in kilts and dance on this pole. One was pretty darn cute! They both looked good in kilts, too. Anyways..forgive my side-tracking. After dinner we went to the Gooders and just chilled out and talked until bedtime. The next morning we lazed around, reading on our lawnchairs in the shade, looking at Hood Canal (I LOVE where they live..it has the most beautiful view of water, trees, mountains) plus they have a huge yard and bank. Then we went into town and did shopping (got new dishtowels and a huge supply of blank cassettes to record music on...Jenny had to pay, of course...that is what mom's and mom-in-laws are for. Little things like cute new dishtowels make me happy, I'm such a freak! Then we went to TJ Max where I found a cute outfit (I won't bother describing it) and best of all I found this awesome Chinese lamp, whose base is dark red and "fake" antique gold. The base has claws, its pretty much like a dragon and the shade is a pretty light beige silk with tiny amber colored beads that hang off the rim all the way around. Sounds really tacky, but it is really quite elegant (ok, and a little tacky) but I hated our bedroom lamp and this goes just PERFECT with my Chinese-themed bedding (dark red with beige Chinese symbols). Blah Blah....I like interior decorating. The best thing about the lamp is that though I was planning on buying it myself, of course Jenny had to say "Oh you know..how 'bout I just buy it for you guys?" Which was cool cuz I really couldn't have afforded it myself (though that wasn't gonna stop me!) Then we were semi-shopped out, so we went home and grilled out steak and hotdogs and ate watermelon and read more under the shade of the giant evergreen trees until it was time to go to a movie. We saw "My Big Fat Greek Wedding" which was really cute and I was laughing alot, but not nearly as much as the rest of the audience (which was annoying in that you couldn't hear half of what was said on screen). It was pretty damn funny, though, I admit. Then we went back to Jenny's and we stopped at the store on the way where I purchased my craving: Haggen Das Coffee Almond Swirl. I left most of it at Jenny's unfortunately, but that is good. I don't need to be sitting around eating a bunch of fattening ice cream all the time. Sunday morning we woke up, made a pineapple-upside down cake together (which tasted Fab!) then we read some more once again under the large trees. I'm reading "Victorian Prison Lives- A Biography" pretty technical and dry, but surprisingly interesting to tell ye the truth!! We then went and a delicious brunch at "Molly Ward's Gardens" where we sat outside and gorged ourselves. Then we went and picked lavendar (smells so good when I am lying in bed in the dark..It is on the nightstand next to the new dragon lamp). Then we went back to Jenny's, read EVEN more and then Jay and his dad got back from their camping trip and we hung about for awhile and then wasted some time (Jay and I) in Winslow waiting for the ferry traffic line to go down. We ran into Jay's old English teacher (who he has talked about before as being a really cool guy). The guy was in a play and sitting outside when it was over with, smoking a cig and looking for some odd reason like Mark Twain (he was wearing a bow tie). He struck me as a very fascinating man and I hope to talk to him in the future (Jay wants to go over and visit him..he was Jay's favorite teacher and he writes poetry, so I gotta take him some and have him critique mine for me). Anyways..very relaxing, self-indulgent weekend (and probably boring as hell to read in this diary..you just had to be there!) Today and work I was once again feeling depressed and a MAJOR lack of concentration. That drives me bonkers..staring at the screen, and the clock in my brain is just rusted out, not even ticking and I"m staring and thinking "jesus..why can't I concentrate." It definetly makes me feel insane. Time to lay low on the klonopin. I have a feeling this is partially to blame. It makes me feel dunder-headed. I'll start using valerian more regularly for an anxiety reliever cuz it doesn't have that same effect on me. Anyways...I'm off to read other diary entries. HOpefully they are all as boring as mine (but still interesting enough to me, since they aren't me..does that make any fucking sense?) oh well, BYE BYE!!

do the jerk * do the frug