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> A man goes to the minister at his church.
> "Reverend," he said, "I have a problem. My wife
> keeps falling asleep during your sermons. It's very
> embarrassing, not to mention disrespectful. What can
> I do?" "I've noticed this and have an idea if
> you're up to the task," said the minister. "Take
> this hat pin with you. I can see when Mrs. Jones is
> sleeping, and I will motion to you. When I motion,
> you give her a good poke in the leg with the hat
> pin. In church the following Sunday, Mrs. Jones
> dozed off. Noticing this, the preacher put his plan
> to work. "And who made the ultimate sacrifice for
> you?" he said, nodding to Mr. Jones. "Jesus!" Mrs.
> Jones cried out as her husband jabbed her in the leg
> with the sharp hat pin.
> "Yes! You are correct, Mrs. Jones!" came the
> minister's quick reply. Mrs. Jones then turned and
> glared angrily at her husband. Soon, Mrs. Jones
> again nodded off. The minister noticed. "Who is
> your redeemer?" he asked the congregation, motioning
> toward Mr. Jones. "My God!" howled Mrs. Jones as she
> was stuck again with the pin. "Right again!"
> bellowed the minister, a slight grin on his face.
> Mrs. Jones again gave her husband a real hard,
> threatening glare. Before long though she again
> nodded off. This time however the minister did not
> notice. As he picked up the tempo of his sermon, he
> made a few hand gestures that Mr. Jones mistook as
> signals to poke his wife with the hat pin again. He
> jabbed her hard in the leg just as the minister
> asked, "And what did Eve say to Adam after she bore
> him his 99th son?" Mrs. Jones jumped up and shouted
> at her husband, "You stick that thing in me one more
> time and I'll break it in half and shove it where
> the sun don't shine!" "Amen!" replied all the women
> in the congregation.