2003-06-16 : Parting is Such Sweet Sorrow
I'm back from my too-short, but extremely blissful weekend. I'm very tired right now as I only had about 5 hours of sleep (caught a Greyhound from Eugene last night at about 6:45 pm...arrived in Seattle at about 2:15 am this morning) Luckily I didn't have to get up until about 9 am, though. The bus was FREEZING. I don't understand why they have the air on so high when Washington (and Oregon) June nights tend to be chilly. This guy was next to me sleeping and I could feel the heat from his body and I almost wanted to cuddle up next to him to get warm, but of course I didn't. I just wanted it to be Larry in that bus seat to cuddle up next to.

*sigh* I already miss him. He sent me a very sweet and emotional email last night after he dropped me off at the bus station. We really enjoy each other. It makes me so happy and slightly scared/nervous.

Anyways, the train ride down to Eugene was uneventful. I just wanted to GET there. Finally, at about midnight the train arrived and there was Larry. He looked cute and smelled nice and I gave him a huge hug and we kissed a little. He admitted that he'd looked around for some red tulips (my fave) to bring to me at the train but the tulips seem to not be in season anymore. The thought/gesture was extremely sweet. He's very much a kind, thoughtful guy like that. He said he had booked a "hot tub" someplace, but I said I wanted to go for a beer someplace first..I was kind of dreading this "hot tub" thing cuz when I think of "hot tub" places I think of nasty places where unmentionable body fluids float around...just un-clean "let's fuck and leave our pubic hairs laying around" type of hot tub places....anyways, we went to some bar (I don't remember what it's called) and had a beer..Larry knew several people...I Just kind of smiled and held onto his hand. There was one guy there named Enid or Ian or something who was oh-so-very THAT. He was actually really cute, but I lost my interest in over the top Goth guys with floppy black hair and Velvet capes right around 1988!! It was fun seeing a guy like him, though. It brought back old times. Actually, being with Larry brought back old times cuz we have alot of similar musical history as far as what we were into in high school....new wave and darker/deathy stuff. He's also a huge fan of the band Japan and I was really into them when I was a teen, so it's fun to listen to those records and be nostalgic.

Anyways, it was time to go to the "hot tub" place..I relaxed as soon as we got inside. Nothing sleazy or trashy about this place at all. Very nice. Private sauna like room...wood walls...dimly lit...and the best thing besides the extremely CLEAN hot tub was that it was roofless....you look up into the sky and watch the trees shift around in the wind. It was very romantic. So we played around in the hot tub...I'll leave the rest to your imagination. It was very erotic and warm and I'm glad he'd come up with this idea.

We went home and lit candles and stayed up for hours, indulging ourselves. I don't wanna give steamy details...it just seems to personal. I'll just re-iterate and say that he makes my legs tremble and he completely exhausts me in the best possible way. I've never had these sort of all-night sessions and they are lovely.

He made me a delicious breakfast in the morning...fried potatoes and fried ham. He also had a pack of assorted herbal teas for me since he knows I like them and he picked up some English Muffins at my request.

We then headed off the Eugene Saturday Farmer's Market...fuckin' hippies. Just kidding...but Eugene is FULL of Deadhead types. They are perfectly fine, but I'd prefer them not to sing songs on acoustic guitars, personally. Alot of fairly cool booths. I saw alot of nice jewelry (and Larry tryed to subtly hint that he'd buy me these earrings I liked but I insisted that he not buy me gifts)....He bought some honey and I bought a beautiful beeswax candle (it's an Egyptian looking cat).

After we had our fill of the hippies, crowds and stupid folk singers (took about an hour or less) we headed off to House of Music (I THINK that's what it's called..Tracita had taken me there before) and I ended up buying The new ...Trail of Dead Ep, a cd by Melt Banana cuz I wanna hear them, Captain Beefheart's 'Safe as Milk' cuz I don't own it anymore...I also got 2 cassettes...The Stones "Her Satanic Majesties Request" and Devo "Hardcore Years Vol. 1" Good score!!! I also bought Larry a postcard (I was sort of making fun of him since he didn't make the first move with me) that shows a 50's high-school couple...The lettering reads "Attention Boys: You can STILL Make the First move AND overthrow the Patriarchy"...it cracked me up...made Larry laugh (and probably embarrassed him slightly)...I hung it on his refrigerator (or I should say 'the house' refrig..he has several roomies..including one of my bestest friends, Tracy (dutch-cheese on diaryland)

After record-shopping, Larry drove me to a little town by the name of Florence..it was about an hour's drive. Gorgeous day, in a convertible...my hair turned into a big tangly bird's nest of course and I forgot sunblock so I have a very pink forehead and face now! We ate lunch in Florence and walked around a bit. Honestly, it didn't matter WHAT we did. It was just nice being together.

Then we went back to his house and took a "nap" (we might have actually fallen asleep at some point)...all the sex blurs together...ha ha. Then he made pasta and then we went out to see his friends' band, Toad in the Hole, who were a really good mixture of traditional Irish folk music and Pogues-esque drinkin' songs! Unfortunately the place was packed like it was St. Patrick's Day and it was impossible for me to be in there after awhile...I felt like I was gonna faint..very claustrophobic (this place was a really small bar packed with WAY too many people..fire hazard, ya know..hee!)

We went home and started listening to Grant Lee Buffalo in his room and instead of getting all sexy on him I started crying. I don't know what my fucking problem was. I just got really emotional and almost depressed (about the ending of this whole thing with Jason, even though I want it to end..about how "none of my relationships EVER last"...and all the other shit that comes up when I start to cry)...I was so angry at myself for breaking down in front of him)....Larry was really understanding and comforting and at one point I was trying to not let him see me cry and he just grabbed me and hugged me and said "Stacey..don't turn away from me" which meant alot to me.

I calmed down eventually and the rest of the night was spent the way most of our time together was spent:)

Sunday afternoon we just lazed around alot and before you know it, it was time to get on the bus and leave. It's very bittersweet.

I was so glad to flop down in my bed once I DID make it home but it felt lonely in my tiny apartment.

Anyways, this is so entirely mushy, I hope nobody has vomited yet!! We have plans to have Larry come up to Seattle for 4 days about a month from now. I can't wait.

Oh yea...right before we went to the bus station we had about a half hour to kill. So he took me to Hendricks Park which is really pretty and we just sat hugging on a park bench and watching squirrels....ok now, everybody say "AWWWWW"