What can I say about my weekend with Larry without being TOO graphic or too cliched? It was full of candles being lit, incense being burnt....He picked me up from the train station and he was still dressed up from the wedding he had gone to earlier and he looked really handsome and within 10 minutes of my arriving we were in a dark parking lot....on a blanket..on his hood (or I was anyway)..my fantasy came true. It was fun and slightly unnerving as cars would pass in the distance making us afraid of being caught, but isn't that part of the fun of public sex?? I definetly have reached my "peak"...I've never felt this much "desire"..It makes me feel so alive to want someone this bad and to be wanted in this way. They need to manufacture replaceable genitals, though...the body can only take so much friction so often. I've turned into a nymphomaniac but I doubt I can STILL keep up with Larry and his wants and desires. *Sigh* He'll be coming up on Thursday for 4 days. At least I have 3 days for my body to recover! I need to start taking cranberry pills so I don't end up with a nasty bladder infection or something. Leaving is always so hard..I starting counting the hours..24, 20, 18....yesterday morning he was making breakfast for the house and I just found myself in tears cuz I HATE saying goodbye (and I just want to be moved to Eugene NOW...I'm ready to leave Seattle but I still have 46 days left) and I was embarrassed to be so emotional (I hate to cry in front of others) so I was up in his room and when one little thing makes me sad, the dam breaks and I just felt so sad and I cryed for awhile and then he came up and found me and I said "Are you SURE you want a girlfriend who acts like this"? And I was almost sobbing and he said "I love you" and he held me and brought me a plate of food and I ate and cryed into my fried potatoes and ham and felt ridiculous but I got over it and my eyes feel puffy today but I'm not so sad. Stupid brain chemistry. Anyways, I plan on going to bed early tonight. Ps..I didn't get to spend as much time with Tracita and Hans as I wanted....Larry and his room are a vortex..plus Trace is very busy studying (I"m proud of her..she's so conscientious!)....Well, time to eat lunch!! Ya know...now I'm tempted to move up my move to Eugene a few weeks earlier...Larry said he can still take a day off whenever so NOW I might move on August 15 instead of the 30th...I wonder if they would pro-rate or if I'd just be stuck paying $700.00 for August rent even though I'd only be there half the month. I better figure this out soon cuz I want to give the apartment manager enough notice. Hmmmm...I need to think, think, think...there isn't any REASON why I CAN'T wait until the end of August, but in all reality I just don't want to WAIT!!
2003-07-14 : Monday isn't always so bad!
Because I had such a lovely weekend, I don't really mind that it's Monday and I didn't get enough sleep last night. Taking the Greyhound from Eugene late at night is rather soothing, actually. Nobody speaks..it's dark. Everybody is sleeping. I drift in and out of a semi-sleep, listening to music. I was listening to Grant Lee Buffalo..particularily the song "Fuzzy" and watching the lights on the road and the dark, tall pine and cedar trees and the full moon that seemed to drift along with the music and it was just one of those beautiful, almost bittersweet moments that I get when I am ungodly tired but awake and my senses are really heightened in an almost hallucinatory way. One thing that made me chuckle quietly to myself is that Somewhere...Not sure if the sign was in Washington or Oregon...the trip all blurred together in a long road...I saw a sign for a store..."Redneck Store"..I thought I was seeing things, but I looked again and there is a "Redneck Store"...I wonder what they sell?? 
