It's a cozy, rainy Saturday afternoon. We are in Newport, Oregon. Larry booked us 2 nights at this fantastic beach front hotel. "The Sylvia Beach Hotel"-it is my dream hotel/b&b because all of the rooms are named after writers: Poe, F. Scott Fitzgerald, Wilde, Collette, Austen, Dickinson, Melville, Maugham, etc.
Last night we stayed in the Lincoln Steffens room. I'd never heard of him. I skimmed through his autobiography (they various works for each author in their room) and found out he was a journalist in the 1920s, 30s, 40s, etc.
Today we moved to the Jane Austen room, which I like more for obvious reasons. I'm sitting in a comfy chair looking out the window at the sea. The Oregon Coast is so spectacular. I cannot stress that enough. Watching the white waves crest and crash and lick the land only to recede again and again and again.
Oregonians and Washingtonians are a nice breed of people. They (we) don't need perfect weather to stroll the beaches. We are happy (and damp) in our Northface windbreakers, staggering against the wind. We walk our dogs in the rain, jog in the fog and don't mind being wet.
Larry has already fallen asleep on the bed. It is so hypnotizing to watch the grey water. I've opened the window just a little to hear the sounds of the surf. People are all reading or writing or playing quiet card games or napping in this hotel. The building is very quiet.
I like to imagine mom and Sarah sitting on the floor in front of the window. They are looking at what I see. They can feel the absolute calm and quiet joy that I feel right at this moment. Sometimes I think I could live like this. A quiet room with soft clothes, warm blankets, a constant view of the ocean, food to fill my belly, company when I want it and all the solitude I so often crave. I love to be alone. I always have.
This is a great weekend. I picked out some cute and slightly sexy lingerie for myself (and Larry obviously) for Valentines...actually it isn't really "lingerie"..it's just a pink silk nightgown with matching undies. I'll give it to Larry tonight along with his card. He brought a bottle of wine (we ended up drinking that on Valentine's Night itself)..It will be romantic. It is times like this when I don't know why I even question our relationship. I feel happy and loving. It is at home, watching the news, eating dinner and all the other mundane things that happen. That is when I feel restless. But never when we are away together. Maybe we just need to become professional travellers (ha ha!) I have never slept (as an adult) right on the ocean. Seeing it as I wake up or staring at it as I fall asleep..I love it. I am almost glad it is grey and cool rather than warm and blue and sunny. I find this more cozy at the moment.
I will be in San Francisco in 12 days visiting T. I will be in Amsterdam in 18 days. One of my friends is having a hard time. Her sister was recently diagnosed with breast cancer. I understand how scary it is when someone you love is diagnosed with cancer. I know how powerless it can make you feel.
I am so glad Larry brought me here. I am so grateful that I can jet off to Europe and explore and have fun for 4 1/2 months. I haven't felt this relaxed and happy for ages. Thank you, Thank you, Thank you!
