I went to see "The Hours" yesterday. Very moving movie. Funny in parts but overall left me feeling very depressed *but the best movies usually do*..Nicole Kidman as Virginia Woolf (I can never remember how to SPELL her last name!) left me pretty spellbound. I couldn't shake the depressed feeling for a couple hours after the movie and as usual, I ended up secretly and silently crying on the bus (trying to hide my face which isn't easy when the bus is crowded)...I had these images when I was feeling that low of how I wanted to get off the bus and walk down to the shores of Bitter Lake and lay face down in the dirt and rub the mud into my eyes until I felt better. Hmmm..I didn't do it. Self-pity is such a nasty emotion and so easy to succumb to, for sure!! When I got home, I went pee and was sitting on the toilet crying when Opal came up to me, swirling her tail around my leg and I picked her up and hugged her to my chest and let my tears get all over her fur and I petted her and she purred and the whole thing started to make me feel just a little bit better. Then I laid on my bed and hugged a pillow and just couldn't really move. I just stared at the wall and thought about nothing. Then Jay came home and I talked to him for a bit about why I was crying and then I felt fine again. I think I needed to be around somebody. I feel this intense/stomach-burning/heart-aching loneliness when I start to feel sad and when I actually AM alone it feels 10 times worse. Anyways, this was one melo-dramatic entry. Not much else to say, cuz it's Monday. I need some high-protein lunch. I think I"ll eat a black bean burrito from World Wrapps.

do the jerk * do the frug