2003-01-22 : If I lived in the country I'd probably have heard the first crow of a rooster!
Now tell me..why the hell have I been awake since 3:30 am? It's now 4:21 and I decided to just get up and start my day. I'm TIRED, though. *YAWNS* I woke up and started thinking about this guy I met last week. Nice guy, very cute and I felt really comfortable with him. We agreed we'd like to hang out as friends, though there wasn't any "spark" between us (WEll, he didn't find me attractive..that was that.) Anyways, has he contacted me again? No. Which leads me to believe that not only is he slightly dishonest ("I'm not looking for "that" (sex and all)") but he also said a few things that made me think "FRAUD"!! He claims to be an anarchist and all the very leftist things that go along with that. He's against "exploitation" of anykind. However, he admitted that he mostly signed up to work with PAWS to meet "chicks" (hmmm....??) and when I asked him to name me something he's "liked" (he wasn't exactly a negative person but he had alot of complaints (some very justified, of course) he couldn't come up with much. I said "Well, you like animals, that's a starter" (he has 3 cats) but he said "Nah..I don't really give a shit about animals. I just don't like things that are exploited." I tryed not to show how much of a shitty thing I thought that was. Isn't part of being against the exploitation of humans and animals the fact that you deeply have a "love" (or at least "a care") about the things you don't want to see exploited?? I don't know...the more I think about him, the more I have to consider that he uses this "liberal activist" label purely to stroke his ego and to attempt to impress and or intimidate other people. He also at one point said "It's great being rich!" This statement didn't really turn me on, I have to admit, because I'm just not all the materialistic. Hmmmm...interesting guy. He said he was looking for someone to challenge him, but I honestly think he just wants a pretty sorority girl who will suck his dick (literally and figuratively) and bow down to his "anarchist ideals"...anyways, maybe I'm just doing sour grapes cuz he admitted he wasn't attracted to me (I asked..he didn't volunteer the info), but I hate people who put on phony fronts just to build themselves up. I wish people would just be themselves, even if they don't always like who "they" are. I certainly don't like myself at least 57% of the time and I'm fulling willing to disclose that info to anyone and everyone! Anyways...I've met two other guys on-line who I plan to meet in the future. One is a short and adorable Japanese man who was raised in Brazil. I think he will be much more "real" and we'll probably laugh alot. The other seems a little more complex. I can't really even describe him. We'll see...I may decide not to meet anybody. I'm just doing what I feel like WHEN I feel like it. Trying to be spontaneous with this stuff. That way I become less freaked out about it (see 1-19-03 entry!) Anyways, I started reading "Rosebud" a biography of Orson Welles and he was a really fascinating man (and has some great eyes and lips, as well!) Can't think of much else to say. Been packing and organizing and in just a few weeks I'll be in the new place! Everybody from d-land that lives in Seattle can come over and we'll have a pizza picnic on my floor..ha ha!!