Had this dream that I was with my step-dad at some sort of Rite-Aid or Walgreens. I had two cats with me..one was Opal (but sort of looked more like my old cat, Boo Boo) and the other was a white cat (I don't actually have a white cat.) I set them down in the store while I looked at strange porcelain dolls, Lee press-on nails. The most icy-blue colored lipsticks (which I thought looked really cool in my dream) and then I seem to recall my step-dad was getting impatient to leave but I kept looking at this secret and under-priced stash of "natural" hair dyes that they had. Amazing shades of candy apple red, etc. Supposedly the hair dyes were made out of herbs and plants, but I couldn't figure out which color to get, and then the cats escaped into the parking lot and it was night and I was calling them and chasing them down to try to get them into the car. I think Opal got scared because there was a black and white dog in the parking log (all the animals were either black or black and white..interesting)..then I sort of woke up.
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My hand still smell like garlic from cutting tons up to put into the spaghetti sauce we made last night..yum. I might go eat the leftovers NOW. Had a job interview at NW Surgical Specialists (or some similar name) yesterday morning. I think it went pretty well. Of all the places that I've interviewed for, that is the one that appeals to me the most, so I hope I get it!!! Otherwise, it's back to the drawing board.
When I got out of my interview (the building was close to campus) I sat on a bench close to campus, waiting for a bus to take me home. It was about 10 am and all sorts of students were bustling to and from classes. I felt like I was back in Carbondale again, only I felt ALOT older than all the faces I was seeing rush by me. But then part of me was wondering if all of them thought I was a student, too (I had my backpack)...it was sort of a deja vu feeling.
All during the preparation and cooking of dinner last night, our roomie C, was talking NONSTOP. Ok, I love the guy. He's very generous, sweet and funny. He's like a big teddy bear, but I think he's a little bi-polar or something and he just WON'T SHUT UP and after awhile it makes me almost want to explode or scream. He doesn't even realize when people are starting not to listen..he just rambles on and on about the strangest stuff. I admit that I avoid being downstairs alot when he's in the living room or kitchen because he has this unnerving need to talk incessantly...you have to actually escape from him. ARGH! It's maddening sometimes..it truly is, esp. because I'm not a very talkative person by nature (unless I'm drunk...) but I could NEVER be honest and just say, "Look, I really don't have the attention span to listen anymore, could you please just be quiet now!?" I just can't do that. Who could?
Anyways, I can tell I have PMS right now cuz things are just BUGGING me. Things like Larry calling up and saying "So, what are your plans for the day?" It just irritates me when he asks, cuz he knows I never have any plans..cuz I have no life here. He just has to make polite small talk when he calls. I shouldn't even be bugged by that..I"m just a cranky bitch. Or sometimes he'll ask me when he gets home from work "So, how was your day?" And I'll say "It was fine." and then about 5-10 minutes later he'll ask again "So how was your day?" Things like that really bug me. I told him the other night that we need to have more intimate and personal conversations sometimes. He tends to want to be talk about very superficial, chit-chatty, small-talk bullshit like how my day went, what should we eat for dinner....Then it feels like the days and nights are always the same. So, I actually had him tell me why he doesn't get along with almost his entire family amongst other more personal stuff because he rarely opens up about himself. I also asked him if his relationshiops have ended or his past girlfriends have gotten frustrated/angry with him because he won't open up and communicate and he admitted that this was probably the #1 reason why his relationships fail, but on the other hand, he doesn't seem to think it's unhealthy to block everything up. He says that he got hurt too many times by opening up too much (being vunerable) and he'll never do it again. He also said that if he totally opened up about his past and "the things he doesn't like to think about anymore" that he'd probably kill himself. I tryed to get him to see that that reasoning RIGHT THERE showed me how unhealthy it is to be a clam and a brick wall, but he's stubborn and doesn't really seem to see it that way. Oh well....one brick at a time. I can't force him to do anything. He'll tell me if he wants to or if he ever trusts me enough..I can wait.
Well, that's about it. I hope everybody has a good weekend!
