Thanks to anyone and everyone that left me kind and encouraging words about my current struggles! I really appreciate it!! I'm feeling better today mentally, though yesterday I FINALLY caught Larry's cold that he had last week, so now I'm sneezing and blowing my nose constantly and taking Nyquil (because I actually NEED it this time, not just to get to sleep) but I don't mind having this cold..NOT AT ALL. It's oddly comforting because I'm not feeling sick in my mind, only sick in my head (head cold) if that makes sense. I'm gonna stay in bed most of today and read and I might watch a movie or two. Just taking it easy. I will go see a doctor soon, but now that I am physically sick I don't want to go to the doc until that goes away. I'll probably be better by the middle/end of the week. As to the debate on whether or not to get back on an anti-depressant..I'm SO TORN. I'm sure it seems obvious to those that have read my diary entries in the last couple of weeks that I need them, but I'm REALLY hesitant. I'd rather try to combat it naturally, as crazy as that sounds. So, I think I might combine a little 5-HTP with a slightly lesser dose of St. John's Wort and see if this improves things. If it doesn't then I will really consider getting on a low dose of a cheap anti-depressant. Regardless of my decision, I know I need to go and discuss this with a doctor, and hopefully it will be a doctor that supports natural medicine or doesn't automatically say "you've GOT to try this or that..." I will just be honest with them and what I want to do with my mental health, etc. Luckily I should be able to start going to counseling in a week or so and I think that will also help! I start volunteer training for WomenSpace this Saturday and I'm really looking forward to that. It'll be nice to think about helping somebody else instead of being so self-absorbed (though a little introspection never killed anybody!)

do the jerk * do the frug